Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Hypnotizing one's way out of a traffic ticket, and other shenanigans

My friend Rob, who has written such articles as Are you starring in your own Zombie apocalypse? , now has a short e-book for those who want to know how to get on the traffic cop's good side. Yes, it does involve hypnosis, but no, it's not as dramatic as what he is known best for.
` Speaking of which, we were recently at an open mike comedy show, on the day that both marijuana and marriage were made legal for any (adult) citizen of Washington, so there was plenty of comedic material. Even so, Rob warned, his biggest shot at making this audience laugh would involve hypnotizing them into it.

Yes, he decided to challenge himself to earning some respect as a hypnotist in this crowd, rather than just some guy who says he's a hypnotist. Although he hadn't slept the night before, and nearly every person who looked particularly prone to hypnosis had just left in a large crowd, he was determined to show them something.
` Most of the rest of the audience were stoned and/or comedians, unfortunately, the latter preferring to watch from an arm's length rather than subjecting themselves to an experience. In the back, however, was one girl who looked like a better subject.
` For posterity, I took some video of what ensued, and Rob uploaded a short clip of it onto YouTube. As you can see, she said that she had not successfully been hypnotized before, yet Rob seemingly had no problem (even though he was talking faster than he usually does).
` Although she kept trying to break out of 'trance', he had no problem directing her back in -- at which the audience collectively made small sounds of astonishment. Or so I assume. What do you think?

Unbeknownst to me, whilst recording this video, a certain comedian (whose birthday was that day) kept nodding into a 'trance' while Rob was hypnotizing this girl. Hence, the comedy night organizer said (farther along in my video): "You know what would be fantastic right now? Could you hypnotize Rumberg so that he can't get enough cock?"
` To which Rob replied, "I already have," which is a type of hypnotic suggestion in itself.

Even so, I thought that Rumberg was joking when he abruptly declared, "I want cock!" and then looked as though horrified into a loss of words. It turns out he was serious -- and infuriated to the point of hurling insults and even a plastic cup full of water in our direction.

Yes, really. (Too bad I didn't get that last part on video, although to be fair, we didn't expect it.) Judging from this experience, it should be no surprise to learn that attempting to hypnotize a police officer so blatantly would have even more disastrous results.

Indeed, subtlety is the key:

Thursday, December 6, 2012

Back from California...

I've been busy, needless to say. I have much to write, including about my trip. We collected Lou Ryan's dead mother's stuff into a moving truck, including her cats (which escaped from their crate along the way), and now we have a house full of much better furniture and other cool things, most of which remains unpacked.

Of course, this cost us a lot of money, we haven't been recompensated yet, Brianade moved out while we were gone, and we need help paying rent. Our last chance is nine days from now. Also, I have to go to court over some dumb stuff. So, that's what's going on in my life right now. Sorry I've been absent.