Although the buffet was preferable, at this hour the Steak and Shake was the only place open, so Leonard and I got a salad (which took at least 20 minutes) and brought it upstairs to the TAM hall, where there was a huge line waiting around to get into Penn Jillette's Rock n' Roll Doughnut and Bacon Party.
` After eating said salad, and stupidly trying to clean up oil with water, as Leo pointed out, I discovered that the line was just for donations/T-shirts. No point in waiting in that line! I didn't even particularly want a T-shirt, but since I had already donated 25$ previous to coming to TAM, I got to grab one anyway and headed in.
The electrical kept shorting out around this time, but I ran into the same Swedish guy and he showed me the money -- not as much as it looks, but it has an ant on it, and Linnaeus. Also, I start talking into my camera again a lot, which is really trippy, and then continue to speak like a normal humon:
To people coming for the first time - WELCOME TO MY PARTY! NOTHING in this room was paid for by JREF. NOTHING in this room was paid for by you. Many people donated their time and talent, and many people donated equipment, doughnuts and bacon. I thank them all. The NoGodBand has been rehearsing with one goal, to BRING THE STUPID! The smarter a man or woman is, the sexier it is when they get stupid. I don’t drink or do recreational drugs and I never have, so when I say stupid, I don’t mean faced -- I mean a real stupid from deep within. Wanna?You'll know I brought plenty of stupid for this show. Here's Penn starting the official show (a bit of swearing, of course):
This is my private party and I want to offend no one, so you are invited IF and only IF you really WANT to experience:
- All the obscenity and taboo hateful words possible (including the only one that really bugs you)
- All the blasphemy possible (including unfair ad hominem attacks on god and religion)
- Krispy Kreme Doughnuts (Elvis’ favorite doughnut)
- Proud stupidity and incompetence
- A celebration of love, and sex.
- A lot of artistic aggressive venting of sexual, political, theological and emotional rage.
- People of all sexes, genders, orientations and kinks scantily clad (within the law)
- People asking people who they don’t know, “Baby, do ya wanna dance?”
- Penn singing out of tune.
- Penn hitting wrong notes on his bass. (Last year it was LOTS of wrong notes)
- Penn forgetting the endings to songs that we have practiced for months (last year, almost every song)
- A setlist that much shorter this year, so I hope we’re a little tighter, but don’t count on it.
- Penn, a 57 year old man, over 300 pounds, jumping around like he swallowed a whole live crazy monkey.
It’s my private party. In terms of manners, you’ve been invited to my home. If you don’t like me, don’t come to my party. This party is for my friends. Please respect that. We just want to have fun. This is not a show. I do a lot of shows. This isn’t really one. This is a party. I’m not doing this to kick off my career as a musician or singer. I have no career as a musician or singer. I’m not good. I’m just monkeying around with my friends. If you want to join in, please do. If you want to say, “Man, he really sucks as a musician,” just say that and walk away. I agree with you. I lack talent, but I’m bursting with joy. If you don’t know the difference, don’t come to my party.
I have no desire to offend anyone, at least not tonight. If you are here, I love and respect you. I don’t want to cause you any discomfort. So, if you aren’t just thrilled about being here, please leave -- it’s Las Vegas and a nice hotel, there’s plenty of fun stuff for you to do. The second something offends you, just leave, it’s not going to get better. Just go away. We’ll talk another time. I take no offense with you avoiding my offensive party. Deal?
But, if you walk through these doors, you have given your consent to enjoy all of the above. You’re at my party and I ask you one question:
Are you ready to BRING THE STUPID?
This one also has swearing, as well as me wandering around the room, not stalking Geo. I find Randi and Maynard, however:
One of the band members is crowd surfing, then they launch into another chorus of "To Serve With Love" when Randi comes up on stage. I got more footage (footage?) of this, but the Flickr limit cuts off just before he says of Penn and Teller, "They're like brothers, they're like lovers."
` Geo knew this, of course, but it was kinda funny anyway, because I didn't have to worry about him thinking that I was sneaking up behind him. You can kinda guess how this all turns out:
` During this time, I discovered that the hotel's pool was outdoors, and remembered -- oh yeah, it's warm in Las Vegas! (The air conditioning keeps one's mind off of that...)
` I didn't stay long, but we had a lot of interesting conversation, and he showed me some crazily stupid thing on YouTube, which was actually a million times nuttier than his air guitarist act!
Also, he let me write this small blog post so that my readers could know what I was up to.
His room also had a view of the pool, but it was hard to see because of the spotlight shining in through the window illuminating the curtains. Don't you just love that?